Toy Story 3: Review

Now wait a fucking minute. This movie got a 98% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes? 9.3 out of 10 stars on IMDB and ranked No. 7 on the 250 Greatest Films of All-Time? You know what I say to that? BULLSHIT! Why isn't this movie in the Top 3?!

What kind of radioactive performance enhancing drug are the people in Pixar taking? These people just can't make a bad movie. I don't think it even computes for them. Every single film- EVERY SINGLE FUCKING FILM they make is a masterpiece in itself and Toy Story 3 makes a mockery out of all of them combined.

I'm going to put my balls on the line and say this right off the bat that Toy Story 3 is going to win Best Picture at the Oscars next year. There's no other way. It is time Academy. It should have happened with Wall·E, it should have happened with Up, but now you have no other excuse but to give Toy Story 3 that gold statue.

Toy Story 3 takes place 11 years after the second one. Andy is 17 and is leaving for college. The toys get mistakenly donated to Sunnyside Day Care which at first seems like a retirement paradise for toys but turns into a prison. The toys has to find a way to break out of the daycare and get Woody back to Andy before he leaves. And this is just the bare skeleton of the film. I left out all the laugh out loud and tear jerking subplots this film has.

Toy Story 3 is Pixar's crowning glory. It shows how far the company has come since it's first feature. The film is much darker than the previous two, the animation is on standard with the brilliance of How To Train Your Dragon, the way it is written is so much more mature and yet it never loses the original flavor of Toy Story. Pixar really does care about this franchise. They didn't sit there and churned out an average film because they know it will still make millions. No. They really sat down, and thought through a finale that would do justice to the legacy of the Toy Story franchise and do justice to the fans.

Sitting in that theater, it was like the Lost finale all over again. This film fits in 3 movies in the 1 hour 30 minutes it is on screen. The first is a prison escape movie where the toys are planning their escape from the day care. I mean, if Frank Capra directed The Shawshank Redemption.. you'd get Toy Story 3. The film is just riddled with so many homages and references to classic prison films. Cool Hand Luke, Escape From Alcatraz and The Great Escape to name a few.

Let me remind you that this is a movie about soft toys and is made to cater for children. And yet it is so compelling to watch. The suspense they have in this is so mind blowing. I felt like I was watching Return of The King all over again. It was just that epic in scale and how Pixar pulls it all off is just so imaginative and brilliant.

The second is the adventurous comedy movie which is peppered through the entire film. You thought Up was hilarious? This movie had me laughing my ass off through the entire film. And the great thing about it is, the comedy they use here is very smart and works on both kids and adults without using any cheap fart, poop, vomit or slapstick jokes. Spanish Buzz Light Year aside.. you won't believe the crazy shit Pixar does in this film. Now I don't wanna spoil anything for you. I'll just say Mr. Potato Head + a tortilla.

The third is a very emotionally charged drama film. I can safely say no other film can make me laugh so hard and then have me crying my eyes out 3 minutes later. And I mean this literally. The ending of this film is just so sad. I feel sorry for you if you didn't at least feel sadness watching how it all ends for the toys and their owner.

And there is another scene which takes place in an incinerator. Now I don't wanna say too much about this one, but remember how sad the Carl & Ellie montage was in Up? This scene is probably the most gut-wrenching, heart-warming, tear jerking things I might possibly ever experience. Jesus Christ, I just might cry thinking about it again.

I was pondering on what rating I was going to give this film while I was watching it. I was set at a 10/10 throughout, then it got to the ending and I finally realized that no rating can ever do this film justice.

RATING: Wooooooooooooooow